Here Comes Santa Claus!

Doing the whole Santa thing was something I wrestled with before Anna came along. I don't want Christmas to be all about Santa, presents, and getting. I want it to be what it's really about. I'm going to throw a Jesus grenade here: Keep CHRIST in Christmas! I guess it doesn't really matter this year; I've got another year to wrestle with it since Anna doesn't quite understand anything yet. But as Christmas nears, I'm reminded of how much I loved Christmas growing up. I loved believing in Santa. I mean, I was 10 (basically in middle school!) before I really stopped believing, and even then I was sad to not believe anymore. I think deep down I knew for a while before I was 10 it was my parents stuffing our stockings, placing all our toys under the tree, and consuming the milk and cookies (I should've known when my mom always suggested putting out oatmeal raisin instead of chocolate chip!), I just wasn't ready to stop believing. After I stopped believing I even kept it alive for my younger siblings instead of telling them like a lot of older siblings do. But along with Santa my parents made sure to share the real meaning of Christmas. They told me about Jesus, about how he came as a baby born of a virgin to bring the world back to His Father. Christmas began to mean more to me as I grew older and learned more about Jesus and felt Him living inside of me, especially knowing the real gift given and what it means for everyone. While Santa was a great thought and fun while I was younger, I couldn't deny Jesus' existence. My prayer is that my daughter won't be able to either.

As of this Christmas we're kind of doing the Santa thing. Well, at least getting pictures with him. I still have another year to decide what we're going to do exactly. I would hate to not give my daughter the opportunity to believe in something that brought me so much joy as a little girl. So for now, Santa lives and he's coming to town!

Classic cousin picture. Each kid is doing something hilarious! Before the picture was taken Anna was pulling Santa's beard! Guess we'll see if she gets coal in her stocking this year :)

She looks so tiny on Santa's lap!

Telling Santa what she wants :)

You said "I know that this will hurt"

The Lord has made Romans 8:22-28 known to me on a couple of occasions.

First, it was a little over a year ago when everyone and their sister were getting pregnant. If you know anything about me, you know that I've always desired to be a mother. I feel like it's part of the calling God has placed on my life. I've been ready since I was a kid and for Travis and me to wait as long as we did to finally have a child took a lot of patience and trusting in God. I was reassured of God's timing and his faithfulness when I stumbled upon this passage and more aptly this verse:

"But if we look forward to something we don't have yet, we must wait patiently and confidently." Romans 8:25 (NLT)

Then a few months ago the Lord brought this passage back to me.

I love God's Word because it's always relevant to what you're going through. You could've read a certain passage 10 times throughout a given year and each time it says something different, something that applies to what you're going through at that specific time.

When I stumbled upon this passage again I was beginning to feel the affects of pregnancy, and I was also thinking a lot about the type of birth I was going to have. Do I want to have pain meds that allow me to feel nothing, and not know what my body is going through or do I want to go natural and feel every contraction, every pain--a pain so powerful some women compare it to completing a marathon? Usually I would say give me the drugs!! But something inside of me was telling me I can do this without meds, I can get through this pain! And I think that something was the Holy Spirit.

Now this passage isn't directly about pregnancy but instead compares our life with Christ here on earth longing for that day in Heaven to a woman who is pregnant, giving birth, and in a whole LOTTA pain. Take a look see (I've added the italicized in parenthesis):

"All around us we observe a pregnant creation. The difficult times of pain throughout the world are simply birth pangs. But it's not only around us; it's within us (Juice Drop). The Spirit of God is arousing us within. We're also feeling the birth pangs. These sterile and barren bodies of ours are yearning for full deliverance (I'm yearning for a full delivery!). That is why waiting does not diminish us, any more than waiting diminishes a pregnant mother. We are enlarged in the waiting. We, of course, don't see what is enlarging us (I'm enlarged and haven't seen Juice Drop just yet). But the longer we wait, the larger we become, and the more joyful our expectancy (pregnancy takes a while, just as labor does, but in the end it's all worth it!). Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting God's Spirit is right alongside helping us along (when labor gets too intense or I get too tired, God is right there with me, experiencing the pain too). If we don't know how or what to pray, it doesn't matter. He does our praying in us and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans (oh, I'll be groaning all right!). He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God (He knows my body better than I do, and He knows I can do this!). That's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good (and when I see my daughter's face, all will be GOOD!)." Romans 8:22-28 (The Message)

Wow! What an amazing passage not just for me going through labor but for that yearning and desire to be with our Heavenly Father. How great the Father's love for us that we will go through whatever it takes to be with Him, and all along He is there right beside us going through the same pain and anguish. We find joy in enduring these "birth pangs" because we know in the end it is all worth it, our joy will be complete, and we will experience no more pain!

I know it sounds crazy, to experience pain for the joy that comes in the end. But I look forward to feeling that pain, to that feeling where I know I'm alive, so that in the end I will be pain-free and will know joy like I've never known before!

**Disclaimer: I realize circumstances arise when pain meds and other medical procedures are necessary for the mother and for the baby. I do not believe this makes the mother less of a mother, less of a woman, or less of a child of God. If you choose or it's deemed necessary to have medical intervention, then that's great. My goal is to have a natural birth and whatever happens in the labor and delivery room happens, and I'm trusting God to get me through it, whether it's naturally or with medical intervention. 

Lost in Translation

What do you get when you cross 2 Americans, 2 Nepali, and a Walmart? You get a language barrier!

Ok, maybe not the best joke, haha! But that's exactly what happened last night. It was a typical night in Birchcroft as we prepared to get ready for Bible Study. Travis was practicing for worship with a few youth girls who play the violin and cello, and Caitlin (who Travis and I live with) and I were trying to round up the girls in the neighborhood. Corbin (one of the missionaries living in Birchcroft) asked if Caitlin and I would be so kind as to take two women who needed a ride up to Walmart. With still 30 minutes until Bible Study started we hopped in the car with these ladies who hardly speak English and headed the mile or so up the road to the store.

"We'll meet you right here at the cash registers when you are done, ok?"

The ladies shook their heads yes and walked off on a mission to retrieve whatever they were after. They didn't grab a cart so we knew they wouldn't be too long. Caitlin and I moved through the grocery section (or lack there of) wondering what was for dinner later that night. After agreeing to the easy but hearty beans, rice, and corn combo we headed toward the check out in the hopes of meeting our fellow Walmart comrades. After about 20 minutes of browsing the magazines in the check out aisles Caitlin and I began to wonder where these ladies were. Did they get lost? What exactly were they coming here for? Did they escape unnoticed somehow? After three circles around the mega store and another 30 minutes we began to worry and wonder what we should do. We even had a Walmart employee helping us. We decided that Caitlin would stay and monitor the store while I drove toward Birchcroft seeing if I could spot these two ladies heading back to their apartment. So many thoughts were reeling through my mind as I drove that long mile, How do you lose two women? What is Corbin going to think? Is he going to wonder if I'm fit for this ministry? Please, Lord, protect these two women! I finally reached the apartment complex as Bible Study was letting out, and as usual the kids were running the streets kicking a soccer ball or just hanging out. I spotted Travis and waved him over to the car. After I told Travis what happened he grabbed Corbin and I relayed the story once more. I let out a sigh of relief when Corbin started laughing. He went to check the ladies apartment and I followed behind in the car. Sure enough there the ladies were, safe and sound at home! Luckily Corbin had a kid with him who spoke the same language the ladies do. One of the ladies told Corbin that they must have misunderstood us and walked home. I knew there were no hard feelings when I saw a huge smile come across that lady's face. She thanked me and we both apologized for the misunderstanding.

After picking up Caitlin from Walmart I finally was able to breathe and just laugh at the situation, a situation I was afraid was going to turn out bad. Language barriers are tough but I know that Christ can break those down; I saw it in the smile of those ladies who after they thought we left them still graciously thanked me.